Dating science

Love, Actually: The science behind lust, attraction, and companionship

Amie Gordon has always been interested in relationships. But even at that age, such surreptitious reading mostly led to frustration: Why did the characters make such bad decisions? Why, in essence, were they so bad at relationships? Now an Assistant Professor of Psychology, Gordon continues to ask those same sorts of questions, only now about real relationships: How and why do romantic relationships form? How are they maintained? And why do they often fail?

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Scientists in fields ranging from anthropology to neuroscience have been asking this same question albeit less eloquently for decades. It turns out the science behind love is both simpler and more complex than we might think. What we do know, however, is that much of love can be explained by chemistry. Think of the last time you ran into someone you find attractive. You may have stammered, your palms may have sweated; you may have said something incredibly asinine and tripped spectacularly while trying to saunter away or is that just me? And chances are, your heart was thudding in your chest. As it turns out, love is all about the brain — which, in turn, makes the rest of your body go haywire.

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Everyone in the dating game spends untold time, money, and emotional energy trying to find a nice person to chill with on the couch while you both actually watch Netflix — but somehow, most of us still feel like we're striking out constantly. Well, yes: There's no reason to fly blind. Luckily, because of the ubiquity of dating and researchers' enduring fondness for studying all varieties of mating dances , we have a huge bounty of research to draw on. That means thousands and thousands of study subjects have made all kinds of dating mistakes so that you and I don't have to. These studies, surveys, and experts can help us all figure out what works — and maybe even up our chances. With the caveats that some of these findings are difficult to generalize and none of this advice will help you meet your soulmate tomorrow, here are seven science-backed dating tips.

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The Science Behind Dating Matters

Share sensitive information only on official, secure websites. Learn more about how Dating Matters was developed and the evidence demonstrating its effectiveness for preventing teen dating violence. CDC examined the feasibility, sustainability, effectiveness, and cost of this comprehensive model for preventing teen dating violence in these four communities. Local health departments in these cities recruited middle schools in neighborhoods identified as having above average rates of crime and poverty.

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